Good day! Or is it night? Anyway, hi! Today, we're talking about my final name change and how burnout actually saved me from spiraling! When it comes to streaming, for me at least, I tend to start off very excited to just be there and be in the moment! Laughing at what chat shares with me, dealing with minor to major scuff or reacting to how chat uses their "toys". Meaning redeems or audio/visual effects. This energy tends to last me for the first month of my return after a break and then the fuse starts to run down very quickly. All right, audio issues are starting to be more frequent. After raids, there's sometimes risks of minors or bad actors wiggling in to cause problems. My mods always have my back, I'm fine. Who's that behind me, you ask? Oh that's just Num Burrs; don't worry about him for now, he's not doing anything wrong. Now then, where was I? Oh, yeah, some programs start to get buggy or unresponsive. Chat laughs it off as scuff, but I'm actually starting to get a bit frustrated over it because it was cooperating before only to consistently defy me.

I'm going to start posting a few clips chat has made of my antics on YouTube. Mr. Burrs starts muttering behind me. Not now, Burrs, I'm in the middle of something. Now, I need to think of worlds I'm going to in VRChat to match the mood I'm going for. I can't just stand around in the same places all the time, people would find that boring. The mumbling gets louder... All right, I need a new outfit to keep things interesting, too. Maybe I should change the hair? No, that color isn't right... Let me look up a tutorial on Contact Receivers when I'm playing with friends... Num Burrs has me in a vice grip. Oh, that VOD didn't perform as well as the last one... Oh, the chat died for a bit there... I've sent out more raids than I've received again, huh. "What am I doing wrong?" And then, BAM! I'VE DONE IT TO MYSELF AGAIN.

Let me give you some context! I'm an only child. I was raised by a fairly strict grandmother that believed in switches and I'm not talking Nintendo. At my age now, I'm not sure if it's just because I'm "Neuro spicy" or if I just caught on more quickly than the other kids, but I was averaging on the A or A/B Honor Roll every month. That came at a cost; I was the weird goth kid that was into anime, not the AP Physics type. So, sometimes, I'd struggle with performing well. Did I get an "A"? Good, I'm supposed to. Did I get a "C" because I couldn't understand instantly? All right, I'm a failure until I improve. Other family members I never even talked to or heard of were getting scholarships and high marks, so I should be doing the same if not better! That mindset followed me from my formative teen years right into adulthood. If I was not consistently performing at my absolute best, I wasn't going to be good enough. It's also extremely easy for me to view the numbers as a comparison to others in the same category as I. Oh, I'm not doing as well as (X), so what am I doing wrong? They don't seem to do too much different than I. Is it the time slot? Okay, I'll change and stick to it for a while. What's that? A Partnered streamer is streaming at that slot now? Well, looks like I'm going to lose out on viewers because they're more preferred! Time to change again! Oh no, I'm losing some regulars because they're in college or employment! How do I balance all of this??? Some acquaintences (who never talk to me about literally anything else) are micro-celebs on Twitter now and I can't consistently get double digit interactions let alone many comments on my tweets. Now, they want to brag about it or constantly bring it up?? Hm. No, I shouldn't feel bitter, I should be happy. So, I'll stay quiet. Better to not say anything than spout anything mean, right? ...What am I doing wrong...?

Here comes the final identity to the rescue!!! It's Nova Midnight! This isn't a rebrand or a mask; this is ME! This is the quirky nerd kid's escape and desire to be an anime lady. This is the dream of the girl who wanted to apply to be a voice actor for Rooster Teeth! This is the girl who would perform her little heart out on Guitar Hero: Warriors of Rock on Saturday night when no one was around to listen! The more I view her as myself, the less I care about the numbers, the views, the fame. I found so much fun in being myself. I initially shut the channel down due to some nasty remarks on Twitter, but now I know I have this blog site whenever I want to escape that vortex of suffering. Where did the name Nova Midnight come from? I'm a huge fan of Sonic Rush and the boss fight song between Sonic and Blaze is called "Vela-Nova". When I first introduced myself to my theatre class, I told everyone my favorite color was Midnight Blue and I just find the night sky and the stars so fascinating. Now, roll some of my IRL experiences into the character and you've got a space queen who found herself as an Isekai HR Specialist! I want to extend a deep and heartfelt thank you, Kind Reader, for taking the time to peer into the lens that is my life and how things operate from my point of view. I also want to take a moment to say that DanielDogIRL is a coward and a rascal of whom you should never purchase potions. They are filled with lies and deceit. The blogs will continue as "Nova" and there will be new posts here and there when I get an idea for one.

Will Aly disappear forever? No, no, no! She'll be around at least through to the end of 2026! I would rather stream as her less as she no longer represents me. VODs, YouTube videos and the social media account will still remain up. Until we connect again, Kind Reader.

This is based on a true story.